HOW TO WHORE FOR HOLLYWOOD

WHORES OF HOLLYWOOD

I HIT IT FIRST....Where's my check?!

Are you not satisfied with the occasional glorifying comment on Instagram? Have you been jealous of your friends as they rudely text other people at dinner while your phone never rings, chirps or dings? Do you feel invisible and want to finally be noticed? Dare to be rich and famous? Seems you want fame for the wrong reasons. Or you want it for the right reasons...Maybe you are uber talented and want to share your gift with the world, well mere talent isn't enough. What does it take to make it big in Hollywood?  

THIS...

Lose all of your sense of individuality. The truth is, being famous has nothing to do with you. The most famous people in the world are not famous at all. No one knows who they really are. They are products, ideas, caricatures and nowadays, they don't even need to be talented. They exist like mannequins in a department store, there to advertise for the bigger company. They are mindless zombies. This is who you are to become. You're not expected to speak liberally. Your publicist will do the talking, through your programmed mouth.

Aint that ironic?

Allow for the creepy smiling people to take full control. This means you will have to ask permission to put your hair in a pony tail today. It also means that your personality is to be so exaggerated, that you forget what your real personality is at all. You want to be a huge star huh? Are you really ready for your big break? Prepare to be taken away from your family and lured into a life of materialism. Where cars replace a warm embrace and the people who come around you always want something, anything but a deep conversation devoid of ulterior motives. 

Welcome to brights lights and lonely nights. If you want to go all the way with this, then you need to understand, that it's all or nothing. There is no Devil to sell your soul to, but there is an establishment. If you're Black, you more than likely will need to White wash if you want those "Trump Checks." As NeNe Leakes said, "White is right." Do the nose, get the bleach, wear the wig. If you're Will Smith, play it safe and never upset the White people. Follow these examples, because Kanye pissed those White folks off and now he is falling, just like his song, All Falls Down. 

Be quiet! Let us speak for you.

How dare you have your own mind? You didn't play the game, now you're out of the running

Fame is something like America's Next Top Model. They are told to shut up and be marketable. If they go against the judges, the puppet masters, they will be eliminated. Killed? Think about the opening song, "So you want to be on top?" Think about how they mold those young naive girls into what they believe is most marketable. Think about them, no real identity. They are just a contestant in a race to be the next top celebrity who will only be there momentarily. Because someone will sure take their place, earlier if they act up. So you want to be on top? You better be prepared to give up your essence. You better be ready to work damn near to death while you lose your mind and forget your soul. 

BE GAY FOR PAY

Boy Bands and pedophilia in the industry.....GAY PAYS

You will see things their way, if you're going to be a sex symbol, they will most certainly want to sample the goods and if you reject, there are many more standing in the line you just waited in. Your dating life will be staged, your belief system corrupted but your bank account will grow. Your birthday party will be televised while your mother watches from home, with tears in her eyes, wondering if you got her card. 

You'll start to miss her, but there will be too many departing flights to remember what's wrong or right. 

Take off your clothes, give them your body, give everything to them. Join the party, start dancing, you won't even realize that you're not even dancing, they are moving your body for you. You will look up, to see people pulling strings. You will see yourself in an interview and wonder who that person is.

It'll be like someone else is famous and you are getting all of the credit for it. 

But hey, this is your dream right. I don't want to be a party pooper. 

Here are a couple of examples of the biggest whores in Hollywood. If you do what they did, then you have a pretty good chance of making it. 

KIMYE

Case Study

Whore makes history by making VOGUE cover

"Well.... I guess I'm cancelling my Vogue subscription. Who is with me???" -Actress, Sarah Michelle Gellar

Whores can now appear on the most coveted cover known to the gay man

On the Vogue Cover: Gia Carangi, April 1979

Vogue has pissed White people the hell off! It's name is synonymous with high fashion, as it has always been the top fashion magazine in the world. Any anorexic self loathing model who has graced it's cover, has earned the right to be there. However, it has also featured the unconventional, such as Lena Dunham and Michelle Obama. Whether it be Beverly Johnson, Gia Carangi or Kate Upton, it's look has helped to diversify an industry. It is just sad to me, that the days of glamour are gone. You know, when supermodels existed and major fashion magazines actually used working models for their covers. Gone are the glory days, when celebrities were mystifying, left their private lives to the imagination and magazine covers featured those who worked their asses off to get there. Gone are the days, when beauty was more than botox and stars were famous for a reason.

It seems that in 2014, to be mainstream, all you need is a dick to suck, a camera, and Ryan Seacrest. F.Y.I. It doesn't have to be an A list dick, nor a B list. I agree with Sarah Michelle Gellar, I am canceling my subscription to Vogue!!! Wait, I don't have a subscription to Vogue. So why the fuck do I care if she's on the cover? Oh I remember, PRINCIPLE.

Kim belongs on King magazine, not the cover of Vogue. Kris, the evil mother, has sold her cash cows at the auction block. I'm sure Kim will send her daughter North in every cardinal direction for the sake of the dynasty. This is why a Ralph's supermarket frozen foods section bimbo has made it in Hollywood. I am not a hater, so this will not be devoid of any praise to Kim. I commend her for being able to turn a negative, embarrassing sex tape, into a multi-million dollar career for herself. Her slutty mouth is responsible for countless people being able to feed their families. Her whoredom has gainfully employed lots of people! 

Except me! Where's my cut? Fuck these bitches!

But us regular Americans who are no where near Hollywood, are quite sick of Kim, Kimye and the Kardashian tribe of attention whores. Sometimes I wonder if these people are actually popular, or just being FORCED on to people.

BE AN OPPORTUNIST

Kim the opportunist has sucked more Black celebrity dick than Superhead and she finally met her match. Kanye, incorporated her into Kimye. The merger of their two brands, (This is how the Hollywood egoist elite think, love isn't a factor) became a celebration of the talentless art of overexposed narcissism. If you want to be a FORCE and not just a sound bite on Entertainment Tonight, then be an opportunist and BUILD UP your affiliations and partnerships. Look at marriage for what it really is, a business opportunity. All the greats did it, Jennifer Lopez, Elizabeth Taylor, Marilyn Monroe and now HER.

Kimye has made the top of my list of top earning Hollywood whores because they have sold themselves as well as their daughter. LITERALLY. (Sold photos of their GPS enabled daughter for millions)

I really just wish Kimye would fuck on that motorcycle, keep the cameras off and ride into the sunset, never to be seen again. I used to think Kanye was talented when he came out, but I soon realized it was an illusion. He was forced onto me as this conscious talented rapper who was actually brain dead. Instead of the rebel he dressed himself up as, he was apart of the problem of the establishment that he pretended to be against in his music. He created a brand which essentially is the act of brainwashing people into thinking they know who you are and what you stand for. But essentially, it's all smoke and mirrors. 

BE OPEN TO HUMILIATION

When Kanye married the biggest whore since Cleopatra, I asked God to give him herpes of the eyeball. I already hated Tyler Perry, but when he put this whore in his movie, I wanted to throw a pan of grits in his face. This was a woman who got married just for a television network to pay her a million bucks for a special, and you cast her as a marriage counselor in your film? Kimye doesn't care about their reputation, they will interrupt speeches or use blood as a skin creme. Just like Marilyn was willing to let her dress fly up, you must be willing to do whatever humiliating act they want you to partake in. They reward you when you prove you're loyal and trusting. Basically they reward you when you let them control you.

Final Kimye shade, I can't help it...

LUPITA NYONG'O needs to be on Vogue, Kimye needs to be at the Family Dollar shopping for paper plates. Being on the cover of Vogue has been a lifelong dream of Kim and I applaud her for her efforts. The thought of all that Black dick being lodged down her throat...Who says hard work doesn't pay off?! 

Now I am just waiting for the Kimye sex tape to leak.........................................................................

RIHANNA

Rihanna and fuck buddy Matt Kemp

BE AN INDUSTRY HOE

Rihanna has done the dutty wine on so much high yellow dick, that the centers for whore control have quarantined all light skin Black men, including Obama. From Chris Brown to Common; Matt Kemp to Drake; Dudley O'Shaughnessy to Ashton Kutcher (She went REALLY light skin with Ashton Kutcher) this hoe is about as loose as bowels after collard greens drenched in hot sauce. 

Whips and chains excite her and she wants you to suck her cockiness. This woman will sing about dick like it is paying the bills! Rumor has it that younger woman loving Jay Z put her on after he dicked her down. Kind of reminds me of Aaliyah and R. Kelly...but let's respect the dead. 

Anyway, Rihanna has no shame in her game, and that is quite attractive to me. I love her confidence and the way she can make the most dirtiest of subjects seem like harmless elevator talk. That woman has been yodeling and fucking her way to the top and there is no denying her status as a pop queen. 

Rihanna's main dick, Chris Brown

It's not like she has a Whitney Houston voice or can dance like Janet. It's not like her dutty wind is worthy of a wet tee shirt contest at a Caribbean festival in Fargo, North Dakota. What she has is ratchet pussy and an endless determination to dominate the charts. What she has are producers with their pants unzipped and a Rolodex full of pregnancy scares. The Barbadian bimbo has sold every ounce of whoever she was, to become a red carpet fashionista with stiletto nails and continuous number 1 singles. A true whore, will do whatever it takes, and Miss forehead, I mean, Rihanna, has DONE IT ALL. And I mean, DONE IT ALL...

I love me some Rihanna, if you're going to be a whore, flaunt it like it's Gucci and in season. She simply doesn't give a fuck as she rolls blunts on top of her bodyguards bald head and parades her men around like the court made her do community service. Come here rude boy!!! 

To make it in this industry, one has to give up their body and soul in the hope that Hollywood will leave the money and the rewards on the dresser. Sex, Drugs and Lucifer is the name of the game, and if you're not about at least one of these things, you'll be sent packing. Show them that you are willing to be controlled, possessed and used for their purposes, their agenda. It has nothing to do with you, even when they announce your name at the awards show. The illusion is that it is your ego that is being displayed when in actuality, it is theirs. So do all that applies to you, all that is expected of you, and remember, BE CAREFUL WHAT YOU ASK FOR, BECAUSE YOU JUST MIGHT GET IT.