Saturday, June 21, 2014


How do you know you are drop dead gorgeous? When you get arrested and millions of people around the world glorify your mug shot, even though you have committed violent crimes. When the crime is not the headline, but the conversations are about your sexy face. When women Tweet, that they will let you rob them of all of their possessions as long as you fuck them. When gay men create Facebook groups that idolize you. When news stations across the globe feature your mug shot, and again, not because of a crime, but because of your bedroom blue eyes, chiseled features and succulent full lips.

Jeremy Meeks is that guy. He has a long rap sheet dating back over a decade. He has committed identity theft, robbery, he has owned guns illegally and been affiliated with a gang.

His mugshot, though sexy, scared the fuck out of me. In his eyes, all I saw was evil. I feel for his victims, not for him. I do have to admit, I did achieve an erection while staring at pics of him shirtless with his brother. Fantasies started inundating my mind about him and his brother tag teaming my tight gay asshole.

Yes, a bad boy. That's what every straight woman and gay man secretly wants it seems. We want a thug in the sheets, but not in the streets. We wouldn't dare marry or even date a thug. (Us respectable hoes) But we would sure let him violate our bodies in the bedroom. I admit, I have had rape fantasies about Jeremy. But I digress.

Jeremy is mixed, but it is unfortunate that another Black man becomes a famous criminal. It was even more pathetic that Black women were glorifying him as if we don't have enough negative stereotypes. However, who am I to judge? I've been arrested, but not for violent crimes. I have secretly lusted after thugs myself.

I just wonder, what do people find attractive about him? For me, it's his prettyboy thug appeal. It is interesting that yet another light skin man is being glorified. Would we lust after Jeremy had he been dark skin?

A penis photo of Jeremy has been leaked, and his fan base has been reinvigorated. I will probably enjoy his penis picture later on when I am alone in my bed....

Alleged fat, thick, juicy, half-erect, cut dick of Jeremy Meeks

My initial reaction when I saw that dick

I hear there is a sex tape to go along with the photo, it doesn't matter to me if it's really him or not, a juicy fat dick will suffice for my "session".
He will more than likely go to prison for a very long time. He obviously didn't learn his lesson after the last arrests, so it is clear he just needs to be sexy behind bars. I know those trades in prison will have a good time with him. I wouldn't mind seeing a video of that....Damn I am sadistic.

Does society secretly want the Black man to be a thug? Is the Black thug the most sexually desired creature on earth? I think so. Has the media and pop culture influenced young Black men in a negative way?

YES. Even Black media like BET has made little boys feel like they are obligated to sag their pants, stay away from books, bounce basketballs, shoot guns and yell out, "THUG LIFE!"

Growing up gay and geeky, I was teased and bullied for not only being gay, but for speaking and acting "WHITE" I was called an "OREO" because I didn't use street lingo and I actually studied in school. I guess being smart means you are acting White. Blacks don't even realize how they are programmed. I tried so hard to sag my pants, speak in a deep voice and I even got my hair cornrowed to achieve the standard Black man look that was desired. It matriculated into the gay lifestyle as all the Black dudes I tried to date said I wasn't HOOD enough, I wasn't Black enough.

Who is the Black man? He is multifaceted, he comes in many colors, lifestyles, mental capacities and tax brackets. He is not always outside of the liquor store selling rock, he is also in The White House.

Yet all we can do, is fetishize the Black man. We masturbate to D'Angelo, naked in a video with cornrows. Tupac had to be a "thug" in order for you to hear his educated, quite deep messages about society. If he were always in a suit and tie, would you have given a damn about him?

He was far from a "THUG" He was marketed that way

Friday, June 20, 2014


My legs
have run too many miles
Spread open
Where were You?

My skin
Scratched from within
Bruised all over
Touched by sin
I feel like this is the end...
Where are You?

My eyes
They've rarely seen the sun shine
instead of looking forward
They're Glazed over by time
Lost and near sighted
Looking behind.

This soul
bought and sold
its relevance put on hold
You said You'd save it
Where in Hell were You?

My pillow
Ripped open
from tears
Angry and tired
Hope killed by fear
In this smoke filled room
Where are You?

In this
Unremitted desperation
Where are You?

In this
Bed of thorns
Where are You?

In this
Mental warfare
Where are You?

In the streets
of my great depression
Where are You?

In this
Childhood cancer
Prayer without answer
Worldstar Hip Hop
Video dancer

My God, My God
If this Earth is Yours
Where are You?

Where on Earth

Are You...................?

Tuesday, June 3, 2014



Only twenty for my gas, I'M JUST HONEST
Drivin' to work on E, I'M JUST HONEST
Starving artist life, I'M JUST HONEST...

Engine light, no dough for mechanics, I'm just honest
Bottom shelf drunk, I'm just honest

I keep a gang of broke niggas with me too
We still doing the same nigga shit we used to do
I was going lie to you but I had to tell the truth
I'm just being honest

My card declined again, I'm just being honest
Whites with money help me live
I'm just being honest
Spent my last dollar on weed, I'm just being honest
Gave up tryin' to succeed, I'm just being honest
I'm a YouTube star for life, I'm just being honest
I fuck at truck stops, I'm just being honest
Do whatever to pay them loans
I'm just being honest
Can't remember if we fucked or not

I keep a gang of broke niggas with me too
We still doing the same nigga shit we used to do
I was going lie to you but I had to tell the truth
I'm just being honest

Cops stay poppin up in my rear, I'm just honest
Aint been to church in years, I'm just honest
Bloggin' to pay the phone bill, I'm just honest
Thought about stealing from the till, I'm just honest
I'd Kim K till I'm rich, I'm just honest
Suck it betta than your bitch, I'm just honest
Gold diggin' if trees aint growing, I'm just honest
Fuck Christmas, everyday it's snowing, I'm just honest

I keep a gang of broke niggas with me too
We still doing the same nigga shit we used to do
I was going lie to you but I had to tell the truth
I'm just being honest...