Wednesday, October 14, 2015


Checkout my YouTube video above on this topic

Clicks of profiles, stats given and you are reduced to an ensemble of numerical values that lead to meaningless body movements. You are a gay millennial, devoid of Kevin Costner and a plane which takes off without you. A real date would be great, however, you often find yourself NAKED instead of nude. Your burning desire to be wanted is intertwined with the regret of wanting his body without reaching for his personality. So here you are on the floor, next to the enema, wondering if you should have just gone out for pizza with your straight friend instead....

Has protocol already been established, that this is as good as it gets? The best date is receiving a blowjob from the Grindr boy with the great abs who stays to watch American Horror Story after licking cum off your left nipple. Ah yes, cuddled up against the dried semen of his abdomen while watching Lady Gaga claw some sluts guts out. How romantic. The macabre scene reminds you of this moment, he in your bed, clawing away at your soul with reductive sex. You are brutally addicted to the flesh while desiring love because one is readily available. You know that the best blowjob pales in comparison to the deep conversations you have with your straight bromance companion. You spare him the gory details, but you can call him whenever you want. You discuss your day while discreetly rubbing your crotch in the midst of his alpha male baritone voice. He is your best friend, your confidant, your pillow talk after a worthless hookup that you secretly wish was him instead...
or maybe you don't...
Who are we kidding, when he took his shirt off at the pool... you haven't been the same since!
And my straight friends have been hotter than this...Pray for me

The moment of truth. 

You receive intimacy from your hot straight friend, but get your rocks off with gay men. If only your straight friend were gay....but then again if he were gay, he'd be reduced to another Grindr conquest. After all, he fucks at least three different women every couple of weeks, the number of conquests would no doubt increase if he were gay. He is everything you want, but you've grown accustomed to his disease of heterosexuality. A horrible affliction that prevents him from showing you the thick cock that women seem to line up for. 

The red enticing apple that the straight God dangles in your face

(Even your slutty female friend who spilled the beans on the good you secretly hate her)
But you can relate to him, because he speaks of wanting to settle down but not being able to put down the Tinder app. He on Tinder, you on Grindr, and both of you loving each other intimately without sex. You'll never admit it to yourselves or each other, but he talks to you more than any woman. The twenty second long embrace after confiding in each other, the tasting of his beer at the bar, you make him laugh unlike Susan or Rebecca and "I love you man", came out of his lips after you talked him out of losing his shit when his crazy ex arrived at the barbecue.

Do you love him? Yes, as a friend, but you can't love him more than that, he's something like a brother to you. He's been there for you more than any gay man you've dated. People often whisper about you two because your chemistry is other worldly, but why question the chemistry?

Society attempts to delude you with the notion that you have nothing in common merely because of opposite sexualities, but yet here you are, rotating around the same nucleus. 
Me and a straight buddy back in the day lol

Why can't many of us gay men achieve intimacy with each other? Why do many of us find solace in relationships with straight men? Many may call us names, judging us and assuming we just want to conquer straight man drawls, however the heterosexual male, brings us REAL intimacy, real friendships. For many of us, we simply cannot find the same camaraderie with other gay men. You and your straight buddy are a beautiful miscegenation of two worlds, that aren't so different after all. He gets lonely, and so do you, the void is filled but not completely, because the world has told us that SEX is all encompassing. 

See, what I have with my straight friend, is a real relationship. I'll never speak of it as such to him, but spiritually, that is what it is. I am not delusional, however I know that sex is not necessary when it comes to souls merging. I of course still want love with a gay man, but I will always have my straight buddy, who gives me late nights without worrying if sex will ruin things. He TAKES ME AS I AM, while profile number seventeen, wishes I were more masculine. He pats me on my back, encourages me, while they scream, "no fats, no fems" and my "Date" looks disinterested when he realizes I make less than him. 

We break each other down as a community, meanwhile, there is an array of straight men who come into our lives prepared to build. A lot of straight men cannot be intimate with each other due to societies bullshit programming. Quiet as it's kept, many straight men seek gay men to be friends with because they are often unable to unravel to their straight buds and afraid to be vulnerable to their women who often want them to only listen to their shit. 

The gay/straight man relationship is an enigma to the world but one of the best kept secrets because it is one of the strongest bonds known to humanity. We make an excellent partnership, not only because women love gay men and straight men can benefit, but because we are MEN at the end of the day. MEN who wish to express themselves with other men. MEN who no matter who they sleep with, have similar desires. We are carnal beasts with a warm sensitive center. 

Yes straight men can find straight best buddies, but they can also find a gay buddy who won't freak out over a hug that lasts too long. Secretly, all men want to be hugged, no matter if he is in Hell's Angels or Chippendales. 

One day, I hope to find the level of intimacy that I have built with my straight buddies with a gay man. Because then, it will be coupled with sex...But that always feels like I am asking the universe for too much. Sex, intimacy and love? 

For now, I'll meet my bro at his place, where he will change my oil for me then take me out to the movies. This time, we are seeing what he wants to see, "The Martian", he's such a dork. 

If he were gay, I'd be jacking him off during the film, but he's not. (Kidding) That's right, instead I will be enjoying a witty conversation after the film instead of a shitty ass with a porn movie in the background. 

Ah, the beautiful intimacy I share with my straight buddies, and the uninspiring hookups I have with gay men from the internet.

1 comment:

  1. How insightful. The gay men I've remained connected with over the years were those that I had no sex with. I've also been in business with and close friends with a straight man since I was twenty-nine and he was twenty-three. Scotty